Innocence Lost

The other day I had to explain abortion to my 10 year old son.

I'm not trying to make a political statement or create any sort of firestorm. I just have to say that this conversation was right up there with answering the question, "Why aren't grandpa and grandma married?" which was asked through such innocent eyes.

I had been avoiding this abortion conversation for some time. A few years back there was a newspaper article in which planned parenthood listed important things to talk about with young children regarding sex. There were obvious things like "good touch" and "bad touch." But one recommendation set my blood boiling.

They said that little girls, starting at age 5, should be told that if they become pregnant they do not have to have the baby. I don't know who recommended that specifically, but I could only imagine my five year old self playing with all my baby dolls, dreaming of being a real mommy some day, only to have my mom confront me with the cold hard truth that if I get into a bad situation there is a way out. Nothing like indoctrinating the young.

I do not label myself prolife or prochoice. I have never financially supported a prolife organization or walked a picket line. I have friends, who I'm sure, would look down on me for this. But the truth is that if one of my at-risk students came up to me and said that she was pregnant and asked what to do, I would do everything in my power to help, financially support, and comfort her. I also know that I would offer to raise her child as my own if that was what she wanted. I would not bat an eye, my husband would be on board, and my children would be thrilled. They don't understand why we stopped having babies in the first place. They believe that every human life is precious, and the more the merrier, no matter how cramped and chaotic that merriment may be.

So, I am pro-babies, pro-women working together to find a way, pro-love. One thing I know is that we could always use more of that in the world.

The way this whole topic was broached was because of Obama. Many of my friends had the abortion talk with their kids during the election letting them know how fervently Obama supported abortion, and thus encouraging them to vote against him. My son has revered Obama, along with a good portion of this country and my husband and I allowed it. We talked with him about the many good things that Obama stood for, and avoided this talk. We avoided it until one of our son's friends said that Obama kills babies.

I, personally, don't like to use inflammatory language like that, so when Lukas told me what they said with incredulity in his voice I tried to calmly explain that Obama doesn't actually go out and kill babies. Then the abortion talk began. "See, back in 1973 there was a law passed that allowed women to kill the baby inside of them if they didn't want it, if they didn't have enough money or didn't have a husband to help take care of it."

The look on my son's face broke my heart. I hate shattering his innocence with the harsh reality of this life. Tears pricked his eyes as understanding sank in. Mothers killing their own babies, inside themselves. I saw it through his naive eyes and loved him more as he said that he wished he could just make all the bad things in the world go away, selfishness, everything.

"Me, too, Lukas, I'm sorry."

And so I wonder if another hero has fallen in my son's mind.

Not realizing that my 6 year old was listening, I heard his little voice say, "I'm glad you didn't kill us."

Horror struck my heart.

"We would never have done that, honey, you are so precious to us!"

From the mouths of babes, to the ears of those of us hardened by so many years in this place.